ok so i have a Christmas party on the 14th and i need some good clean jokes to tell any help you guys can give would be great:)
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ok so i have a Christmas party on the 14th and i need some good clean jokes to tell any help you guys can give would be great:)
2nd grade joke, you know how to catch santa? dig a hole in the back yard, fill it with ashes and in the middle leave a plate of cookies. when he comes for the cookies, kick him in the ash-hole!
A guy is walking down the street when he hears someone yell, "Hey, Dave!" He turns around and looks, but he doesn't see anyone. He walks on. After a short while he hears someone again yell, "Hey, Dave!" Again he can't see anyone who shouted out the greeting. He's obviously getting irritated. He walks on and after a few feet he hears someone again yell, "Hey, Dave!" This time he turns around and yells, "MY NAME'S NOT DAVE!"
In the land of Trids there is a terrible troll. Whenever he sees a Trid he kicks it. The Trids try to avoid him, be he seems to be everywhere. One day a rabbi decides he will end the scourge of the troll. He finds the troll and says, "You can no longer kick these poor little Trids. I'm here to protect them. If you're so tough, kick me you big, stupid, ugly troll." The troll just smiles and says, "You silly rabbi, kicks are for Trids!"
There was a rich woman who had just added a grand ballroom to her mansion, but decided that it needed a mural. She invited a painter to the mansion and showed him the wall. "I would like Custer's last thought painted as a mural on this wall. Can you do it? I give you all winter while I'm away in Florida to do so." "Sure, I can." They agreed to his pay along with her allowing him to spend the entire winter living at the mansion. He spent a lot of time partying with friends, but as spring drew nigh he knew he better get to painting. He worked feverishly and finished just before the day she would return. He had the painting hidden behind long curtains and the woman did not want to see it before it was unveiled at her first grand ball. The painter was nervous during the ball waiting for the unveiling, but finally the woman had his mural uncovered. Indians picked cotton in fields lying below majestic purple mountains all done in fine detail. However, what stirred everyone was the cows in the sky with halo's. The woman turned to the painter, "What does this mean for Custer's last thought?" He replied, "Holy Cow! Look at all them cotton pickin' indians!"
